Can I please leave the house without being forced to endure yet another fancy strip show?
One woman told a friend, after I walked out, mid-performance, offended and uncomfortable, that I was just “jealous” I wasn’t the center of attention. Ah yes, that classic trope. The only possible reason a woman could be critical of anything another woman does is jealousy. CAT FIGHT!What is “real” burlesque if it isn’t the dozen or so performances I’ve watched over the years? I’ve seen both “professional” and “amateur” performances at both mainstream and “alternative” venues, as well as, of course, on television. How many of these shows do I need to watch in order to be sufficiently qualified to say that watching a bunch of white girls with tattoos (no dis to the tattooed, but thanks to Suicide Girls we seem to think tattoos and piercings are patriarchy-killers) getting naked on a stage for a cheering audience is still about objectifying women’s bodies and, beyond that, these shows are, honestly, boring?Lady after lady after lady walking on to a stage, dancing around for two minutes before stripping down to her thong and shaking her ass (albeit with different props than the lady who proceeded her) is not creative, interesting, or revolutionary. The only difference between strippers and burlesque dancers is that burlesque dancers are well-off enough to call their strip shows a “hobby.”If I want to see a strip show, I’ll go to a strip club. But do you think it might be ok for us to eat dinner or go to the bar without having to endure an hour of weak-ass choreography that NO ONE WOULD EVER WATCH if it weren’t served with a side of ass?Why do girl trends always have to be about getting naked or pole dancing? Why does female “art” or performance still have to be about performing for the male gaze? When do we get a new trend? Tassels and top hats feel so old-news to me.
Adrienne sent this to me thinking I would hate it and I hate that I actually like it. GD you xojane.
There are certain points I agree with but for probably different reasons: as I’ve said so many times before I find the pole dancing craze infuriating because consumers of pole classes want to sanitize it and make it “art” by separating themselves from the dirty sluts who created it, on top of which pole dancing classes around here often take over strip clubs for their embarrassing graduation ceremonies.
And I have the same problem with burlesque performers; even a few of the Suicide Girls on their awful US tour in 2004 or 05 went on record as saying “we aren’t strippers, we don’t pick up dollar bills with our twats.” which is hilarious because a bunch of them were strippers, and also posing naked on the internet for 300$ total, forever, is somehow more feminist than—omg. sorry I’m so distractable, insults from the sex worker wars never go away apparently.
But I still agree with her.
At the end of the night last night I was talking to the cook and counting my money and Backhanded Compliment Moany Girl —I have like so much to say about her she continues to be absolutely dreadful but I’ll try to keep it to one anecdote at a time and just give her her own tag— came up to ask if I needed to cash in for bigger bills. It’s funny how she is never—oops there i go one anecdote at a time pls—ok.
Background I generally wear sweats or pajamas to work bc I do laundry after every shift and I don’t want to contaminate or fuck up anything I like, so I was wearing a gnr tank top with a hoodie, hoodie was unzipped bc I was hot. so the side of my boob was visible and she made a grossed out face and said “is that what you wore today?”
A) what if it was?
B) no for the reasons already mentioned
C) what is wrong with you?!
I try to be unfailingly polite to her just to demonstrate that like you don’t have to be an unending cunt to other women even if you hate them, so I just explained my overzealous laundry policy and saved my annoyance for regan.
Unfortunately when I exploded it all at R later and yelled about BCMG being a condescending fucking bitch, it turned out BCMG was in the next room.
And I feel guilty, I can’t decide if she is genuinely clueless bc her confidence in her own self-evident superiority has rendered her blind to how mean and petty she is, in which case there’s no hope for her, she is just tragically stunted and lacking in empathy and it was kind of pointlessly cruel of me to yell
Does she know and revel in her own horribleness?
I kind of think its the first one tbh. I think she genuinely does not see me and most of the other girls as fully formed people in the same way that she and the few other dancers who share her class background (& its accompanying dreary middle-class signifiers) are.
I mean when she found out I had graduated (and not just with an associates either) she looked absolutely stunned. It was like a dog told her it had a degree, and about as believable.
And by some people I mean the loony libertarian rape apologists I work with.
I posted that amazing video of the girl macing the white guy who wouldn’t leave her alone to my fb. A girl I work with (who friend requested me idk why because she’s basically a horrible human being who spends her night giving out backhanded compliments when she’s not doing far too much for far too little or moaning so loud in the lap dance room that guys either feel embarrassed or angry about what they’re missing out on—that girl, remember her?
and she once told me after I wondered aloud why some customers are apparently incapable of respecting that I don’t want them touching my tits or kissing or licking me, that they just can’t help it. Men are biologically incapable of policing their own behaviour. I guess we’re all lucky we aren’t constantly being raped but I’m pretty sure she thinks that’s a fictional concept.
so obviously I dislike her but anyway)
commented, “I hope she got arrested for assault.”
and I’m like, “I hope you break a leg and retire you privileged horrible douche.”
kidding no I wasn’t. Like an asshole I told her she hasn’t been street harassed enough and that whiny white bro is gonna be just fine.
ps this video RULES. It made my fucking day.